I Gave Notice Today

It's a big deal.

Working out here -- the work I do, that is -- has become almost impossible. And while I can hear the wheels turning in my landlord's mind ("Why can't she just get a job in town doing something like office work or waiting tables?"), there's a truth that I've arrived at during my struggles here in The Sticks:
What I do is more important than where I do it.

That's an important conclusion for me.

Ya see, the meaning of Trailer Park Karma, the phrase and the blog, is different from what most readers seem to have arrived at. It's not about RV'ing, though I now have tons of tweet-followers who thought maybe... I even have a little sub-niche of ex-pat retirees who figure I'm "on their side" -- but given I'll never retire and really don't even understand the word, it ain't about that either. It's not even about low-rent living, although sure, a lot of my posts lean that way. But having little money and just generally "doing without" is only a by-product of trailer park karma, albeit thickly entwined and certainly codependent, in my mind.

I can't succinctly sum up the meaning of trailer park karma, even though I feel it deeply and have no doubts about its presence and influence. It's kind of like music: When you label and pigeonhole it in an effort to simplify it, you suck a lot of the beauty right out of it, and it's no longer what it was to begin with. And you no longer see it. 

That's what Buddhism is  about: Seeing. Really. Seeing.

It's a lot harder to really see when one’s life is overfilled with sensory input on a constant basis. Back in Swamp City, well, if you live there or in any other metropolis, you probably know what I'm going to say. While I had absolutely no intentions or forethought about what living in The Sticks would do for my practice, the result has been nothing short of glorious. 


But that same glory-birthing circumstance -- the lessening of Stuff To Hear/See/Feel/Think About/Do -- has now led me to the end of this particular sojourn.

When you whittle away at your life's pieces, down to particles, and then wipe the atoms away with a final flourish, you've got this: Survival of the compound you know as yourself. And in this world, if you can't make your own food and shelter, you buy it. To do that, you gotta have money. And most of us earn it.

Earning money has become increasingly challenging in The Sticks. It is, after all, the reason places like this exist in the first place. Not many folks can earn a living in a place that (a) has very few, if any, places of business, and (b) is tenuously connected to those places that do have business. The owner of this property told me flat out, "It's so cheap because we can't get anyone to move out here." That fact appealed to me on many levels. Still does. One of the levels, the one where I have to earn a living, has become clogged up.

Back when broadband was new and I grabbed it up early, I remember telling friends that working on the Internet could often be a little like working in a burning building. The frequent breakdowns of the early system (I think I had three distinct entities involved in providing me Internet at that point) gave me ample "opportunities" to leave what I was doing and run over here and dash that blaze out, only to find that another had erupted over there... Now, of course, it's smooth sailing. But not here in The Sticks. 
Not even close. 

Remember dial-up?That's what nearly everyone out here still has -- and I knew that going in -- but it means that there's not a bunch of unhappy customers out this way. There's me with my aircard that delivers Just a Smidge Faster Than Dial-Up speed.

So I learned Rural Multitasking. That's where you :::click::: and then wander across the kitchen floor to wash dishes. A minute or so later, wander back :::click::: and then go feed the cat before wandering back to the kitchen... etc. It makes for a less sedentary life, I'll tell you that!But it can really raise your blood pressure, too, when the clicking you're doing is with the goal of making employers happy. And lately, after a fence builder's mishap on a ranch cut a main fiber-optic line... My attempts at working have looked more like showing up for work and wondering if you’re gonna find the building locked. 

So. Uncle. As much as the surroundings here make my spirit soar, and as much as Swamp City's don't... I gotta go back. I have to be able to get in the building, so to speak, and get my work done.
After all, I write to eat. And eating's not optional.

Besides, I miss The Boy. A lot. The downturn in income has made it more and more difficult to make the drive as often as I did when I first moved this way. Monthly isn't enough.

I'm going back to Swamp City, where I'll live almost smack dab in the middle of four million people, and walk Burb Dawg on concrete sidewalks and scoop up his poop, and listen to the sounds, smell the smells, bear the heat and humidity... and revel in it all. And tell y'all about it, too. More promptly!

Comments

[Georganne Ross]

Thanks for sharing your experience. I'm currently thinking of moving back to Roanoke, as even telecommuting from here is challenging due to power outages and outside distractions. I hope that you'll keep us updated on your return to the city!

@ruralhybrid on Twitter

[Georganne Ross]

Thanks for sharing your experience. I'm currently thinking of moving back to Roanoke, as even telecommuting from here is challenging due to power outages and outside distractions. I hope that you'll keep us updated on your return to the city!

@ruralhybrid on Twitter

[Bailey]

Mixed blessings keep life interesting. Your time in The Sticks, as well as your return to the Swamp City, strike me as falling under this heading.

Welcome back! :)

[tcv]

"How wonderful! How wonderful! All things are perfect, exactly as they are."
— Siddhārtha Gautama

Of course, who knows if he _really_ said it... still, it rings true!

[TPK Bodhisattva, of course]

Exactly. To you all, thanks for the warmth.

[Robert]

You know, River City is a lot nicer place to live than Swamp City...

[TPK Bodhisattva, of course]

In many ways, you're right, Robert. But my peeps are in the Swamp, so there, I must go.

[Dotti Brundrett]

Remember that all of life is change, try to embrace it, when I am faced with changes that I have not chosen, I try to view it as opportunity, and then get excited about all the new things I will experience, we never know what tomorrow holds, it might be wonderful!